From the Sept. 7 issue of the Mile Zero News.
I grew up in a town where everyone, including my family, was from the Netherlands and words like doekie were common, dropjes were a delicious candy, and croquettes were a staple at Christmas and New Years. Now I have to ask my parents to send me dropjes (salty-black licorice) in the mail, I still enjoy a croquette or two while I am visiting in Ontario in December, but I have to stop myself from asking my friends where the doekie is, instead of asking for the dish cloth.
While I was growing up I used to think that I could only be happy as a reporter if I were always on my way to doing something bigger and better. I have also always been a family person and knew that one day I’d want a family of my own. While in school, I was told having a family and a successful career as a journalist were two dreams that, most simply put, did not jive.
However, the longer I work the more I realize that success, at least according to me, comes from realizing personal goals in addition to earning the respect and support of the community the paper serves. The older I get, the more clearly I’m able to see how my two dreams might eventually align.
Recently I read an article published in a Macleans magazine titled, “How Dutch women got to be the happiest in the world.” Not only was this article incredibly interesting to me as a Dutch-Canadian, but it helped further solidify my own definition of success. The research claimed women living in the Netherlands were happier because they lived lives balanced between working and being at home. About 75 per cent of women working in the Netherlands are employed part time. It’s important to note that choosing to work less is possible in the Netherlands because of a multitude of social program that make supporting a family on one full-time income possible.
The article explains that these findings upset feminists across the world. The feminists wondered how Dutch women could turn their backs on the fight our mothers before us fought in order that we might have the chance to chase a corporate dream.
One woman was quoted in the article saying, “Perhaps [Dutch women] are happy because they don’t feel guilty for falling short of perfection. We are torn to shreds between the American and the Mediterranean models of womanhood. On one hand, we are boardroom feminists expecting equality of expectation and outcome. On the other, we are matriarchs, wanting to run model kitchens and walk through meadows with bands of children.”
I re-posted the link to this article online and a number of dutch female friends left comments instantly. None of my friends grew up in the Netherlands, we’re all second or third generation Dutch-Canadians; but somehow, the values of our grandparents or parents have managed to fight through those of north-american feminists and remain strong through the younger generations. We may work more than our counterparts still living in the Netherlands, but I think we continue to think the same way and have many of the same desires.
I may be biased, but I think the Dutch might be on to something. For now, I’ll finish this thought by leaving you with another quote from the same article.
“Maybe this will turn out to be the fourth wave of feminism. Women protect the possibility that one day we’ll wake up and realize that life is not all about acquiring more material wealth, power, status. Many Dutch women that I know want to stay sane, happy, relaxed.”
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